For too long have we hung our heads in shame. For too long have admitted defeat. For too long have the size our manhood considered, “inadequate.”
I DECLARE A REMATCH!!!
In the next week I will call the members of BMP (Bermuda Mohawk Productions), and issue an official rematch to last year’s softball game. Unless disputed, we will hold this rematch on the date of August 30th @ 3 P.M. followed by Crunchy’s for Pizza and Beer (GTG vs. BMP 2.0).
Don’t take this lightly my friends. I expect to see you all out on that field.
Paschal Circus- We need you there this year.
Tommy- Hit those cages, let’s try and hit one this time.
Hattie- Aim for horky’s face.
Nick- Stay on the bench, please.
Timmy- We need you at the game! You’re our secret weapon. Invite Zach too.
Peter- Your dog is our official mascot this year. Beef her up. Teach her to attack on command.
Randi- I need you inside their heads!
Eric- Close down the shop. Bring the little ones. I want the infant on short stop. no exceptions.
Jason Alarm- Don’t think for a second you’re going to be on BMP’s team. We can bribe you.
Loren- Show us the the benefits of that rich latin heritage, for once.
James- You’re our man in the streets, use that charm and get the girls down to the field.
Can someone invite those Kevin and Mike too?
LET’s DO THIS!
(GTG vs. BMP 2.0) Race for the cup. Sponsored by Powerade.
i think war has been declared.
maybe, just maybe, one of the older rock-music-liking mccord brothers can be drafted in. let’s hope so. for my sake at least.
A bribe sounds nince. But we actually only take bribes in incriments of 170 dollars or hammond organs.